February 24, 2012

24th February 2012, 12:48AM

And I'll just smile, and make believe I don't feel a thing.
- Mayday Parade

but no one knows me like you do,
i need you to know that.

February 17, 2012

17th February 2012, 11:02PM

well said.

with that, will be spending the weekend at HATYAI :D


February 9, 2012

9th February 2012, 1:48AM

I've been this crazy perfectionist for almost my entire life, so much that it is only recently that I've learnt to let go a little, live the moment and trust that everything will work out okay.

Taking control of everything was what I am good at. I never thought that there is anything wrong with that, until now, as I take a step back and re-evaluate our entire relationship, I realize how flawed my execution plan was. I was the problem.

This time last year, I was stressing out like a crazy person, trying to make a reservation for dinner at a nice restaurant for Valentine's day. I remember feeling so disappointed and convinced that the day would suck even before it begin, when I failed to get a table. I just wanted everything to be perfect for us. I was disappointed that I had to do it all alone, I was so tired and frustrated. But the day came and it wasn't too bad, we found this tiny Japanese place and dined there as every other place had a waiting crowd. It was perfect the way it was. He never wanted any restaurant reservations, that was what I wanted. I was probably that much of a selfish person, everything was always about me.

Trusting people is what I am worst at. I never believed that anyone could make me happy, unless I do something about it. I couldn't trust him enough when he said he got it under control.

This year for a change, I'll let go and trust that everything will be fine. It's so much easier this way. Thinking of all the years I've been stressing out and not learning from any of them just tickles me. Probably I am just that flawed.